Hamburg

Last night, euro(s)trip became just that. I was taken by my german friend to a strip club and  -- she needed to wind down and it was her other friend's idea anyway.

It was very moist. Male stripping novice with a body like a sweaty rock, looming over the table with fake dollar bills stuck to his abs.

Hamburg

German boys are shy. Much more shy than I thought. Apparently up north you need to sustain eye contact and a smile for 5 seconds or longer or they won't approach. Basically last night was a hot mess, I got circled, a la FEVAR club but no one came forward to dance. For shame.

Staying with a friend and fellow couchsurfer. It feels warm here despite the inherent gloominess of the weather.

On a side note, went to a sex shop, saw the fetish section. Apparently asphyxiated blow up doll costumes are in. Word. There are these little surprise sex packs. That include all sorts for 18 euros. I would be more tempted if it wasn't for the fact I have no space left in my massive backpack. Hobo life FTW.

Copenhagen

We woke up slightly sore on some slopey cushion's on a mate's dorm room floor. However I think this is far better than waking up finding valuables stolen so I took the pain in my leg in my stride.

We went to freetown Christiania, made like the locals... and had a milkshake. Lunch was a blur of happy colours. I got really really hungry afterwards though, which is quite possibly the worst part of traveling, needing to constantly spend money on food. I would report though that even at 7-11, Denmark has awesome awesome pastries.

Walking around more, having coffee and what not, it seems to be the trend here, aside from bicycle riding to just sit in a cafe for two hours... walk a little and go to another cafe. I don't blame the people, it is so windy here, it's a great relief to have something warm in cold hands. We checked in to a dive of a hotel, since Copenhagen hostels are pretty much as expensive as budget hotels. It's alright, we were happy to lie on a bed. We planned to snooze for 30min but R and I ended up sleeping for over 2hrs. It's actually dark now, surprise surprise. We shall try to check out the nightlife tonight.

Off to Hamburg tomorrow afternoon!

Tale of two cities - Malmo and Copenhagen

We crossed the strait Oresund about three times last night. Basically we got in to Copenhagen, didn't look promising with its prices, so we heard that Malmo may be cheaper. So we took the half hour train ride back to where we were before, Malmo, trying desperately to find accommodation at 3am and trying to not get rolled.

Highlight: accessing the internet and making friends with a Greenlandic hobo who refused to let us leave until he showed us his home town on google earth. However, failing to type in the place and only typing earth will only get you so far.

Lowlight: it is so fucking cold.

We ended up sleeping on a friend's floor. Hoping to find a hostel for tonight before we leave to Hamburg. I am hoping, or praying, that today will be Copenhagen's time to shine.

Copenhagen

It is close to 1am, nothing is open and R and I are bedraggled in the train station.

Some friendly people around, one let me use their phone to call. Otherwise not sure whether to crash at a friend's dorm or to splash out on a hotel.

No dogs with cut-able tails.

Stockholm

Had fikka in the old town, Gamla Stan.

Vegetatian food in Sodermalm.

Stockholm has a really great vibe, despite perhaps the crapness of the location of our hotel, it is definitely a place I would return to.

Tallinn day 3-4

So basically we missed our ferry due to being in a sauna induced coma and generally shit time management skills.

• We hopped on a random bus because we walked for about 30min AWAY from Tallinn, by accident, and didn't need to pay since we were lost in translation by the driver
• Our CS host, being a complete legend, took us back for another night
• We smoked hookah and had more sauna
• Went to a reggae club and danced like the ceiling was burning
• Jumped on train tracks as a short cut
• My ribs hurt from the jump
• I got my very own massage. It was awesome.
• Our travel plans are yet again askew, E is going to London the minute we arrive in Stockholm
• I just realised that the pics I have on fb right now consist of about 1 tenth of what I took but cbb to update
• Easyjet can get fucked. Tossers.

Tallinn, day 2

So basically my life is a hot mess. And not necessarily in the good way, if that is possible.

• We got drunk by 2pm.We meaning R and myself. E had a kebab so he was considerably more sober than us two 
• Puking in the park
• Penis game in the old town
• Our host stripped and mooned tourists and I have photographic evidence if you don't believe me
• Passed out, first time it's happened in months
• Plans derailed. Tempers flared. All of us began to want to kill each other. E and R are Germany and France and T is Switzerland.
• We missed our ferry to Stockholm. Because we were too dopey after the sauna to get our asses moving when we had 20min to spare. LOL
• The seedy eurotrash club in Eurotrip (the movie) was not phoney. It was reincarnated in the shape of Hollywood club. "hollyvood cuuuub".
• Everything here is pood and it gives me the shits.

The end

Tallinn

We arrived in Tallinn, Estonia this morning. 6am to be precise. We took a bus from Riga in the wee hours of the morning. It smelled like piss and that was just the seats. I was wedged between 3 fat people including a man who seemed to become more and more naked as the 6hr trip progressed.

We are staying with a couchsurfer now and he is a cool guy. We have the attic and had a snooze after a much needed shower... going for about 24hrs without one, eww! Our host - like the vast majority of Estonians - has a sauna in his cellar. I forsee us steaming it up tonight, tipsy, before heading out on the town. This part of eastern europe is very scandinavian, which does not surprise as Helsinki is only 1hr away by car.

Night time in Riga

Latvian food is interesting. I guess it's in the same mould as all eastern european food: heavy. We ate wild boar and rabbit last night and were pestered by a bee again.

Though it being a Tuesday, we hoped to find an open club. Even the casino here was dead, perhaps not a good sign. Eventually we headed to a gay/sex club called XXL. Think chains, red walls, hairy "bears" holding hands. R and E were hit on badly by two Latvian guys pushing 40. One of them, claiming to be a doctor, told us conspiratorially that his "lover is 16... but he have big penis. Nyam nyam". Well we know who is the bottom in that relationship. Age of consent doesn't seem to be an issue.

Riga

Our introduction to Latvian driving, notorious for being the worst in the world:

Taxi driver: are you have fright of the speeds?
Us: no we're cool
Taxi driver: you are cold?
Us: no, we're ok

Then he hurtled at breakneck speed, using entire streets to turn and generally having a free for all attitude. Somehow, I don't feel so bad about my driving in Sydney any more. This guy was a fright.

Warsaw

Took a train to Warsaw today, 6am, Indian dude was flirting with his Polish gf, playing bongos. I got drenched walking in the park with R and E. We're couchsurfing right now, and it's awesome. Hoping to find one in Denmark still.

Prague and Krakow

This is our second day in Praha and this evening we are taking a sleeper car to Krakow, Poland. If I survived the Xinjiang sleeper once I think this one shall be ok.


The 25 to a room hostel was actually not too bad, a little rough around the edges but cannot complain about the cheap ass breakfast.

We walked our legs off yesterday and undoubtedly it will happen again, with added baggage. Joy.


Last night I broke my vegetarianism big time. With a meat plate that would put the behemoth servings in Lowenbrau to shame. We rolled out of the restaurant which was a nice little hole in the wall. I am typing this after a big breakfast, we will not be eating till dinner. Wonder how it will go. No more absinthe for us though; this is a repeat offence on my part, the drink and I do not mix. No fairies but we were drunk by 1pm. It helps when one of us has a birthday, as R did.

PRAHA

Yesterday would have received an award. AN AWARD FOR THE MOST TRAUMATIC DAY ever. Nearly lost my passport and would have been the star of my own horror story: Terminal 2 - Crazy Bitches in Praha.

But of course things ended up turning out ok... I just had a massive panic attack after not taking my meds and lacking days of sleep. Now I am in a hostel, still really unused to these european keyboards. So we are going out and about today, taking photos, should be good. I will also invest in one of those bumbag things for my passport. Fashion and style be damned.

Ed and i are in paris, walking...

Ed and I are in paris, walking in Vincennes, completely lost. I just saw quite possibly the classiest kebab joint ever. No drunks or hobos outside. In other news; I don't understand french keyboards...

Doha

I'm at Doha airport, Qatar. I feel a little woozy, not sure if it was just the flight or the fact I recently recovered from a cold. It was admittedly a very smelly and crowded affair, yet again I had the misfortune of being behind someone who reclined their seat all the way back.

Doha airport is like many of the UAE airstrips: huge, almost endless airconditioned palaces. Duty free shops with all manner of luxury goods piled high to the ceiling. Ostentatious little embellishments here and there but let's face it, I love it.

I have about 2hrs to kill. Free wireless here, some silly korean boys next to me watching some video and giggling like castrato.

Um... what happened to Denmark?

What indeed? Well seems like the brief interlude there will have to be cut even shorter. E has some business in the UK (sounds like an Italian job but I don't think it's quite so thrilling) so I currently see the mid-end of the trip spiralling out a little unpredictably.

But it's ok, I am the mistress of mishaps after all. We still don't have a place to stay in Denmark yet because the Morrissey-wannabe dude is probably too busy getting stoned to answer my couch surfing request. We plan on sleeping one night in an airport in Riga, Latvia. To save cash. Jesus we're cheapskates.

I'm indulging myself in a very girly way right now -- painting my nails as I type on the keyboard (I know, a travesty, but I also know you do it). This sort of pampering will be alien later on, I see myself looking utterly trashbag by day 3.

It's T-minus 5 days to go till I fly to Paris and there is still loads to be done. I had a brief scare this morning -- or rather, anxious parents did -- because of pretty dire cramps the night before. But rejoice, it isn't appendicitis, which would have been a really crappy note to begin the trip on (pun, intended).

A little whiny voice at the back of my head is telling me to start my arse moving and pack. It's sort of tinny like a mosquito and I am ignoring it for the time being. I will regret this later.